This year Christmas was probably the best Christmas I've had since 2000. I love Christmas, the time with family and friends, the lights, the smells, the sounds. But since I lost Paul (my son) in 2001, Christmas has been hard to get through. Each year I become more used to dealing with his absence, but always in the back of my mind he is there, in the quiet moments, my heart breaks and the tears flow. I wish that Paul could have been with us all this year. I would love for him to meet all his nieces, I know he would love to be around them. I wish he could meet Terry and see how happy Terry makes me.
This year was easier for me. I spent Christmas Eve with Terry and woke up Christmas morning with him and it was the sweetest time. Just being with Terry made me feel good and warm and wonderful. I can't explain in words just how wonderful this year was, having Terry to share it with. I am so thankful to have him in my world.
